"I think I think we fall in love with vulnerableness... it's people's vulnerability that we love in them it's not their ... accomplishments or their strengths really and even in a movie the scenes that you love are the scenes where something was broken or something was opened that you know your own heart could pour into."
increased vulnerability leads to increased rejection which causes you to upgrade your self-worth
but on the odd occasions where I reciprocate the desire of someone in particular the vulnerability of expressing that hits me like a wall